Blondest of Blondes - Hilarious Blonde Video

Blondest of Blondes is all I can say to this hilarious video. This Blonde has a very bad and most embarrassing blonde moment caught on video. Too Funny! What do you think? Don't be shy, leave your comments please. lol I think it's absolutely hilarious!

This "Dumb Blonde" Video Takes The Cake on "Are You Smarter Than A 5th Grader"

Dumb Blonde on "Are You Smarter Than A 5th Grader"... or 3rd Grader in this case! LOL

 

Feel free to share a good joke or any funny content like videos, stories, quotes, etc. if you have some that are not already on this website. Cheers!

Blonde Lands On Sun

An American, Russian, and Blonde were talking one day. The American said, "we were the first on the moon!"

The Russian then turned and said, "We were the first to travel to space!"

The Blonde chimed in and said, "Yeah, so what? We're going to be the first to land on the sun!"

Both the American and Russian looked at one another and shook their heads. "It's impossible to land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up in a flash before you even reach it!"

To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We are going to go at night!"

Blonde Knitting While Driving

A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. He was astonished to see when he glanced over that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting!

Realizing that she was completely oblivious to his siren and flashing lights, the trooper cranked his window down, pulled out his bullhorn and yelled, ""PULL OVER!"

"NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"

At the Doctors Office

A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and complained that her body hurt wherever she touched it.

"That's impossible!" said the doctor. "Show me."

So, the redhead took her finger, pushed down on her left shoulder and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed even more. She proceeded to push down on her knee and again screamed; likewise she pushed down on her ankle and screamed. Sure enough everywhere on her body she touched made her scream in pain.

The doctor looked into her eyes and said, "You're not really a redhead, are you?"

"Well, not really no, I'm a true blonde actually."

"I figured so." the doctor replied. "you're finger is actually broken."

Blonde Gets Stopped For Speeding

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her politely to show him her license.

The blonde replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you took away my license and now today you expect me to show you it!"

Blonde Walking Along The River

Another funny blonde joke for those who like them...

A blonde was out walking along the river getting some exercise when she spots another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo!" she hollers, "how can I get to the other side?"

The other blonde glances up the river and then down the river and hollers back, "You ARE on the other side!"

Blondes Discussing Florida and the Moon

Gotta love these funny blonde jokes, even if you're blonde! They are still funny (I think so anyways; and I'm blonde. I hope you get a chuckle out of it.

Two Blondes residing in Oklahoma were sitting on a park bench chatting, and one of the blondes asked the other, "Which do you think is farther away, Florida or thhe moon?"

So the other blonde replied, "Well Helloooo, can you see Florida????"

Rectum Deodorant

A blonde walks into a pharmacy and asks the assistant for some rectum deodorant.

The pharmacist, a little bemused, explains to the woman that they don't sell rectum deodorant and never have.

Unfazed, the blonde assures the pharmacist that she has been buying the stuff from this store on a regular basis and would like some more.

'I'm sorry,' says the pharmacist, 'We don't have any.'

'But, I always buy it here,' says the blonde.

'Do you have the container that it came in?' asks the pharmacist.

Lost In Lowe's

Two guys, one old timer and one young, are pushing their carts around Lowe’s Building Supply when they collide.

The old timer says to the young guy, “Sorry about that. I’m looking for my wife, and I guess I wasn't paying attention to where I was going.”

The young guy says, “That’s OK. It’s a coincidence. I’m looking for my wife, too. I can’t find her and I’m getting a little desperate.”

The old guy says, “Well, maybe we can help each other. What does your wife look like?”

The young guy says, “Well, she’s 24 yrs old, tall, with long blonde hair, big blue eyes, long

Almost Caught

Three girls all worked in the same office with the same female boss. Each day, they noticed the boss left work early.

One day the girls decided that when the boss left, they would leave right behind her.
After all, she never called or came back to work, so how would she know they went home early??

The brunette was thrilled to be home early. She did a little gardening, spent playtime with her son, and went to bed early.

The redhead was elated to be able to get in a quick workout at the spa before meeting a dinner date.

The blonde was happy to get home early and surprise her husband, but when she got to her bedroom, she heard a muffled noise from

Blonde and the Heart Attack

A blonde gets home early from shopping and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom.

She rushes upstairs only to find her husband naked lying on the bed, sweating and panting... "What's up?" she asks.

"I think I'm having a heart attack," cries the husband.
The blonde rushes downstairs to grab the phone, but just as she's dialing, her four-year-old son comes up and says, "Mummy! Mummy!
Aunty Shirley is hiding in your wardrobe and she's got no clothes on!"

The blonde slams the phone down and storms back upstairs into the bedroom, right past her husband, rips open the wardrobe door and sure enough, there is

Stolen Mercedes

Oscar drove his brand new Mercedes car to his favorite sporting goods store. He parked it outside and went in to do a little perusing with Jan, his regular sales woman.

Jan was a pretty blonde, and as Oscar walked into the store, she happily greeted him. But he requested to look around alone today before he needed her help. She obliged and let him do his thing.

Five minutes later, Jan came running up to him yelling, "Oscar! Oscar! I just saw someone driving off with your new Mercedes!"

"Dear God! Did you try to stop him?"

"No," she said, "I did better than that! I got the license plate number!"

Blonde Telephone Company Crew

Two telephone company crews were putting up telephone poles. At the end of the day, the company foreman asked the first crew how many poles they had put in the ground. "Fifteen" was the answer. "Not bad, not bad at all," the foreman said.
Turning to the blonde crew he asked how many they had put in. "Four" was the answer.
"Four?" the foreman yelled. "The others did fifteen, and you only did four?"
"Yes," replied the leader of the blonde group, "But go look at how much they left sticking out of the ground."

The Blonde Mortician

A man who just died is delivered to a local mortuary wearing an expensive, expertly tailored black suit.

The female blonde mortician asks the deceased's wife how she would like the body dressed. She points out that the man does look good in the black suit he is already wearing.

The widow, however, says that she always thought her husband looked his best in blue, and that she wants him in a blue suit. She gives the Blonde mortician a blank check and says, 'I don't care what it costs, but please have my husband in a blue suit for the viewing.'

The woman returns the next day for the wake . To her delight, she finds her husband dressed in a gorgeous blue suit with a subtle chalk stripe; the suit fits him perfectly.

She says to the mortician, 'Whatever this cost, I'm very satisfied. You did an excellent job and I'm very grateful. How much did you spend?'


To her astonishment, the blonde mortician presents her with the blank check.

'There's no charge,' she says.

'No, really, I must compensate you for the cost of that exquisite blue suit!' she says.

'Honestly, ma'am,' the blonde says, 'it cost nothing. You see, a deceased gentleman of about your husband's size was brought in shortly after you left yesterday, and he was wearing an attractive blue suit. I asked his wife if she minded him going to his grave wearing a black suit instead, and she said it made no difference as long as he looked nice.'

'So I just switched the heads.'

Blonde Waitress in the Truck Stop

A trucker came into a truck stop cafe and placed his order. He said, "I want three flat tires, a pair of headlights and pair of running boards.."

The brand new blonde waitress, not wanting to appear stupid, went to the kitchen and said to the cook, "This guy out there just ordered three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards. What does he think this place is, an auto parts store?"

"No," the cook said. "Three flat tires mean three pancakes, a pair of headlights is two eggs sunny side up, and running boards are 2 slices of crisp bacon."

"Oh, OK!" said the blonde. She thought about it for a moment and then spooned up a bowl of beans and gave it to the customer.

The trucker asked, "What are the beans for, Blondie?"

She replied, "I thought while you were waiting for the flat tires, headlights and running boards, you might as well gas up!"

Blonde And The Cow

A blonde city girl named Amy marries a Colorado rancher.

One morning, on his way out to check on the cows, the rancher says to Amy, "The insemination man is coming over to impregnate one of our cows today, so I drove a nail into the 2 by 4 just above where the cow's stall is in the barn. Please show him where the cow is when he gets here, OK?'

The rancher leaves for the fields. After a while, the artificial insemination man arrives and knocks on the front door.

Amy takes him down to the barn. They walk along the row of cows and when Amy sees the nail, she tells him, 'This is the one right here.'

The man, assuming he is dealing with an air head blonde, asks, 'Tell me lady, 'cause I'm dying to know; how would YOU know that this is the right cow to be bred?'

'That's simple she said, by the nail that's over its stall,' she explains very confidently.

Laughing rudely at her, the man says, 'And what, pray tell, is the nail for?'

The blonde turns to walk away and says sweetly over her shoulder, 'I guess it's to hang your pants on.'


(Nice to see a blonde winning once in a while...lol)

Wire Glasses

There's this blond who went to an eye doctor to have her eyes checked for glasses. The doctor directed her to read various letters with the left eye while covering the right eye.

The blond was so mixed up on which eye was which that the eye doctor, in disgust, took a paper lunch bag with hole to see through, covered up the appropriate eye and asked her to read the letters.

As he did so, he noticed the blond had tears streaming down her face.

"Look," said the doctor, "there's no need to get emotional about getting glasses."

"I know," agreed the blond, "But, it's just that I sorta had my heart set on wire frames."

28-Ounce Water Pump

A blonde called an auto parts store to ask if they had a 28-ounce water pump.
"A what?" asked the confused parts guy?
"My husband says he needs a 28-ounce water pump." She replied.
"Hmm, a 28-ounce water pump? What kind of car is it for?" asked the parts guy.
"A Datsun," answered the woman.
A light went on in the parts guys head as he ... {full joke}

Three Blondes who Want to be Detectives

Three Blondes were all applying for the last available position on the Highway Patrol. The detective conducting the interview looked at the three of them and said, "So y'all want to be cops, huh?" The blondes all nodded.

The detective got up, opened a file drawer and pulled out a folder. Sitting back down, he opened it and pulled out a picture and said, "To be a detective, you have to be able to detect. You must be able to notice things such as distinguishing features and oddities such as scars and so forth."

So saying, he stuck the photo in the face of the first blonde and withdrew it after about two seconds. "Now," he said, "did you notice any distinguishing features about this man?"

The blonde immediately said, "Yes, I did. He has only one eye! "The detective shook his head and said, "Of course he has only one eye in this picture! It's a profile of his face! You're dismissed!" The first blonde hung her head and walked out of the office.

The detective then turned to the second blonde, said, "What about you? Notice anything unusual or outstanding about this man?"

"Yes! He only has one ear!" The detective put his head in his hands and exclaimed, "Didn't you hear what I just told the other lady? This is a profile of the man's face! Of course you can only see one ear!! You're excused too!" The second blonde sheepishly walked out of the office.

The detective turned his attention to the third and last blonde and said, "This is probably a waste of time, but . . "He flashed the photo in her face for a couple of seconds and withdrew it, saying, "All right, did you notice anything distinguishing or unusual about this man?"

The blonde said, "I sure did. This man wears contact lenses." The detective frowned, took another look at the picture and began looking at some of the papers in the folder. He looked up at the blonde with a puzzled expression and said, "You're absolutely right! His bio says he wears contacts! How in the world could you tell that by looking at his picture?"

The blonde rolled her eyes and said, "Well, Helloooo! With only one eye and one ear, he certainly can't wear glasses."