Nasty Prank On Christmas Morning

This is a joke about a couple who had been married for several years.

The only friction in their marriage was that the husband would constantly fart very loudly upon waking each morning. The smell would make his wife's eyes water and she'd gasp for air.

Each morning she'd beg and plead with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her ill.

He advised her it couldn't be stopped and that it was totally natural.

She told him he needs to see a doctor and that she was concerned that one of these days he'd blow his guts out.

As the years went by, he continued to let them rip. Then, one Christmas morning as the husband was sound asleep upstairs, the wife was preparing a turkey for dinner. She looked at the innards, neck, gizzard, liver and all the other spare parts and a malicious thought popped in her mind.

She ended up taking the bowl upstairs to where her hubby was sleeping and she gently pulled the covers back, pulled the elastic waistband back of his underwear and poured the bowl of turkey guts down his shorts.

Later she heard her husband wake with his usual trumpeting, followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic foot stomps as he stormed to the bathroom.

His wife could barely contain herself as she rolled on the floor laughing with tears in her eyes. She reckoned after years of torture she'd finally got revenge.

Approximately half an hour later, her husband came downstairs in his blood stained undies with a look of horror on his face.

She bit her lip as she asked him what was wrong. He replied, "Darling, you were right. All these years of you warning me and I hadn't listened to you.

"What do you mean?" Asked his wife.

"Well, you always warned me that one of these days I'd end up farting my guts out, and it finally happened today!"

But, by the grace of God, with some Vaseline and my two fingers, I think I got most of them back in!"