How the Angel Became Atop the Christmas Tree - Funny Christmas Joke

One Christmas, Santa was having a really bad day. The local elves union was up in arms over their contract and were threatening a walk-out. Mrs. Clause was pissed that Santa was never around to appreciate all of the hard work she had been doing around the house.

Santa decided he needed to go home, sit in front of a fire and relax. When he got there, Miss Clause was all up in his face and wouldn't let down.

Then, there was a knock on the door. It was Rudolph. He said the reindeer were sick and tired of Santa not upgrading to the new lightweight sleigh and they were joining the elves walkout. Santa slammed the door and threatened "The next person who knocks on that door is gonna get it!"

At that time, there was a knock on the door. Santa flung the door open and there stood a tiny little angel. The angel had been searching for the perfect Christmas tree for Santa's house all day long, until it found the perfect one. The little angel asked, "Santa, I was wondering where you would like me to stick this tree?" And that is the story of how the angel atop the tree tradition began.  

Source: http://www.jokecenter.com

Funny Joke on Steps to Cook a Turkey

Steps on How to Cook a Turkey

1: Go buy a turkey
2: Take a drink of whiskey, scotch, or JD
3: Put turkey in the oven
4: Take another 2 drinks of whiskey
5: Set the degree at 375 ovens
6: Take 3 more whiskeys of drink
7: Turn oven the on
8: Take 4 whisks of drinky
9: Turk the bastey
10: Whiskey another bottle of get
11: Stick a turkey in the thermometer
12: Glass yourself a pour of whiskey
13: Bake the whiskey for 4 hours
14: Take the oven out of the turkey
15: Floor the turkey up off the pick
17: Turk the carvey
18: Get yourself another scottle of botch
19: Tet the sable and pour yourself a glass of turkey
20: Bless the saying, pass and eat out

Source: http://www.jokecenter.com (It's been modified slightly)

Funny Job Application Letter or Resume

Imagine getting this funny job application letter or Resume, the guy who wrote it should apply for a comedian position

Source: http://twitpic.com/6z4jq7/full