Poor Norman
Norman staggered home very late after another evening with his drinking Buddy, Mick. He took off his shoes to avoid waking his wife, Brigid. He tiptoed as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading to their Upstairs bedroom, but misjudged the bottom step. As he caught himself by grabbing the banister, his body swung around and he landed heavily on
his rump; a whiskey bottle in each back pocket broke and made the landing especially painful.
Managing not to yell, Norman sprung up, pulled down his pants, and looked in the hall mirror to see that his butt cheeks were cut and bleeding.
He managed to quietly find a full box of band-Aids and began putting a Band-Aid as best he could on each place he saw blood.
He then hid the now almost empty Band-Aid box and shuffled and stumbled his way to bed.
In the morning, Norman woke up with searing pain in both his head and butt and Brigid staring at him from across the room.
She said, "You were drunk again last night weren't you Norman?"
Norman said, "Why you say such a mean thing?"
"Well," Brigid said, "it could be the open front door, it could be
the broken glass at the bottom of the stairs, it could be the drops of
blood trailing through the house, it could be your bloodshot eyes, but
mostly . . . it's all those Band-Aids stuck on the hall mirror."
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Hi, that reminds me of one similarjoke. But I only know it in german, so I apologize in advance for the bad translation and the bad language - but it is too funny I think:
ReplyDeleteNorman tells his friend that every day if he comes home his wife waits behind the door shouting at him because he spewed his shirt. So the friend says to Norman: "Hey lets do a trick. Take 100 dollars and tell here that someone else spewed on your shirt and he gave you 100 for cleaning it". What a nice idea! Norman thinks. So coming home his wife waits again and looks at him ready for the showdown. Norman say "No,No I dod not spew my shirt. Look here I have 100 dollars a guy gave me to clean the shirt. He spewed on me". His wife looks at him and says with an angels voice: "OK my dear, if this is the truth then go back and request another 100, because he also shit in your pants!".
LOL Robert, Good one! It is too funny huh? Thank you for sharing it!
ReplyDeleteBon